So I talk with my clients a lot about thoughts as the source of our emotions…
How when we feel crazy, negatively-charged emotions, they are almost always driven by some thought or fear. Whether we know what that thought or fear is, is the question. Looking more closely inside our mind, expanding our consciousness to what thought is driving… is absolutely part of “the work” in coaching. At least how I roll anyway.
So typically when we’re freakin’ out about whatever is going on, or whomever did what, or whatever else that’s falling into the category of “upsetting,” that’s the moment to stop and take a look. The emotion will likely be clouding your view, which is totally normal and understandable. Give it a shot anyway… ask yourself these questions to help you uncover that painful root thought:
What am I believing to be true, that’s making me feel so upset?
Deeper than the details of the specific situation… what am I believing to be true about myself given the circumstances?
What am I afraid of? (Ask yourself this question a minimum of 5 times as you dig deeper with each answer.)
The most painful thoughts and fears to dig up (sometimes called “gremlins”) are the deepest ones that try to tell us we’re unlovable, not good enough, or any version of that sentiment. I mean, shit dawg, if it were TRUE that we were unlovable, not good enough, a failure, unworthy, or whatever else, I’d guess we’d all feel like poop and spend our days feeling terrible, lazing on the couch away from awesomeness and others, etc. Yeah, I’m not interested in feeling like, or living like that either.
We’re all human, and we’re all going to have our emotions.
I like to joke and say, “emotions suck,” hahaha because of course when we’re feeling the harsh ones, it does totally suck. Duh. But of course really emotions are awesome. Painful emotions point us to our often-unconscious thoughts and fears. As such, emotions are also our own unique opportunity to expand our consciousness, and clear that crap out of the way.
What do we get when we clear that crap out of the way?? When we actually release those gremlin thoughts, the positive energetic space that opens up is IMMENSE. When we actually connect to the thoughts that we are loveable… we are good enough… no matter what, it’s all good… we are perfect, etc… we are released. In that release from those painful underlying thoughts comes a flood of active energy, feelings of freedom, happiness, peace, positivity, love, hilarity, joy, fire, ecstasy, everything.
Consciousness is our access to all that. Ongoing and expanding over time through the continual clearing away of the BS thoughts, replacing them with our own decided positive reality, and taking actions in our lives to continually show us all that awesomeness is in fact what’s real. The most beautiful f*ckin’ thing about this… is that it’s a practicable skill.
We are NOT victim to our emotions.
We are NOT victim to the things happening around us. We ALWAYS have the power to direct our thoughts and our actions… to positively experience our lives and every bit of the adventure at every turn. Even the times our emotion take us over and we can’t see through it, that’s ok… even in those moments, we can know it’s not real. We can know that fear is not real. We can know it’s up to us to decide what is.
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Hope this helps, all! We are always awesome, even when we feel like we’re not. 😉
Hit me up via email or in the comments.. I’d love to hear any thoughts or feedback you have!
As always, thank you so much for your time and energy to read and follow!
XO
PS. Watch the movie, Divergent, if you haven’t already. It’s AWESOME and I’d even consider it follow-up homework to this blog post. Hahaa 😉 But seriously, watch it.